time: 13 October 2008
C.A.R.I.N.G. it sounds easy for every human being. Everyone can said that they cared for people around them every seconds in their life. But who can really deliver the word CARE well??
Communication between humans sometimes goes wrong when words are misinterpret. A simple regards could turn into bad intention if its not being delivered well. It night turn into 'Kepo' instead of 'Caring'. What a hurtful words. I hate this word KEPO!!
I myself do experience some of these cases when my intention of caring a person turns irritating. Can't be deny that it really hurtful every time my concern makes people feel uneasy. SORRY!I DIDN'T MEAN IT!!
sometimes in the midnight,plunge under my pillow, i would be wondering am i overdoing with my caring?? how could my caring irritate the people around me?
i do ask some of my friends before and the conclusion was- I'M ASKING TOO MUCH!!
well,i do admit that sometimes i have some silly question. Maybe not sometimes but always. But how can a person cared for others when they knew nothing about them? My intention was only that i wish to know more before i started to care for the them. Moreover,I'm that kind of person which my IQ wasn't that high. I'm totally not diligent in observing faces and situation. So what's wrong when i got more question than others?
In my mind i might think that by sharing peoples stuff,feeling and thinking is the best way for me to cared for the person, but it seems like I've steps on the wrong moves. Maybe it was good but certainly not the best. Knowing less might even do well. Too much of caring doesn't brings any benefits. People do not appreciate, in the other hand they might be thinking 'well,its none of your business'
I could say out loud that i cared for everyone around me. From my family to my friend. But seems like not much of them appreciate my favor.
My sis would be the first one that i'm gonna wondering to what extend my caring should go to. Remember that when we're both young, whenever she got beaten by mom or bro(dad dotes her a lot that he rarely beat sis), i would send her medicine to apply. Sometimes i do apply for her too and vice-versa.But as time pass, our gap seems to grow further and further. No more concern words from both of them. Only foul words whenever we talk. My caring seems to irritate her much. Even more than an outsider. Well,no more hope that my caring paid off. Can you imagine the feeling when your own sister never like you? Don't even wish to see you? She once said before "if she comes back home,don't ask me back. Our eight character(八字)bo ngam"
well, i do feel so at first.when i'm agitate at that time but this words actually slash my heart deeply. Its deep as i don't feel anything at all now. T_T
caring for a person shouldn't turn to this kind of result. it should be heart-warming and hapy things but that's what happen WHEN CARING TURNS WRONG!!